Life and Death on Zoom

I have been to an online funeral and an concert, all live.  Life on Zoom.

Wales is still not open, and half my sister in law's family still live in England,  so a border funeral was arranged for a man, who had intended his body go to science, but because of the virus had to be buried instead.    There are people who populate our histories and my brother's father in law is one of them.  I have known Roy since my 20s I suppose, I have holidayed in his house, shared Christmas drinks and laughed at his brilllaint stories. In the last few years he has lived in a home,  but despite that my brother has regularly included him in theatre outings and meals out,  despite being in a wheelchair and over 90,  it was lovely that he and my step dad were able to be the two oldies on family outings.  But then came the virus and the worry that he was in one of the most vulnerable places ever.  But it was not the virus that killed him, suddenly he was ill and then gone.  He has left a hole in our lives, so it was an honour to be able to watch the family, albeit from a great height by video feed as this unexpected farewell was given.

Not all the family managed to tune in - the usual online glitch.  Two days later I was again dealing with technology, this time to tune in for a live concert from Portugal.  Sahaja is mostly in lockdown, its income, which mainly comes from people coming to gain enlightment, reduced, and the need for security, unnecessary when all contact is over the net,  so my son is no longer needed. It is time to move on.  Having railed at times against his decision to live with a guru,  I now feel very emotional about the end of this time.  It has been such a brave and extraordinary way to live and what comes next who knows.  Om's partner though it is a brilliant singer and before they left, she hosted their Sunday concert, with songs that she had written herself and more familiar bhajans.    I have been privileged to enter their world their occasionally, I wonder when or if we will be back.

Adventures at M and S!

I once suggested to a possible date that he check out my blog as I thought that would give an account of me and my life, only he declared it boring!  That could explain my lack of readers and in truth now I am not in Kg or Senegal there is less reason to write it, but we are living in historic times right now so I feel duty bound to report on the latest excitement.  We are allowed to shop!   Non essentials re-opened on Monday leading to fisticuffs at the entrance to Nike.  M and S in Cheshunt however was hushed calm with a hint of sci fi.  First the ritual hand bathing - a first for me as I have avoided gels - but the spectre of all us old folk with masks on all at a distance did feel odd. And we could not try clothes on and the sales staff actually did not even touch the clothes I had to line them up so that they could scan the bar code.  I then walked home which knackered me and is evidence that my fancy that walking up to the allotment and watering things is keeping me fit is a delusion.  

Our death rates are still over a 100 a day, I do not feel I can really rest easy till they are below 50 but the news that Beijing is again paralysed following an outbreak at another food market is sending alarm bells around the country.  This despite them finding that the market in Wuhan was not the original source, raising more questions about the laboratory there.   Trump pointed the finger,  could he be right, now that is a horrid thought. 

To try and keep myself calm over the weeks I have been doing some embroidery, only today I have realised I have embroidered on the wrong side of the fabric, so this evenings excitement is unpicking it. Who says I have a boring life!

Testing times?

Several times on the news I have seen interviews with people who say that their Corona test results have taken ages to come back,  I think I now know why. 

I have had about four bouts of either my M.E or something else since lockdown, perhaps it is caused by panic.     I was especially worried that what people said was hayfever might be something worse, so last week I booked a virus test.   It came very promptly and I thought I had sat and read the instructions properly but tonight it seems like I missed step 2, which is to register the test.  So I tried doing that myself just now online, but cannot find where one is supposed to register, so I just rang for help. Yes they are open at 8pm at night.  And a very helpful person has registered my test. 

To my amazement I have now had the results - and the tests are negative.  There are good things about this as I realise now that I just carried on with my usual self isolation when that happened, i.e. having a walk and if necessary going to a shop with my mask on, but perhaps I should not have been doing that.perhaps I should have just really been in my room for two weeks. ... I really have not mastered the art of managing this situation, but the bad news also is that I have not had it. That means one I have been ill a lot of the time anyway, and two I still have no protection against the damn thing.

A small safe dose might have been a good thing.

Anyway all credit to the phone line and the testers and a complete idiot to me for getting it wrong.

Taking the test - one is told not to touch any part of the mouth other than the tonsils, but the gag reflects kicks in, and shoving something up the nose that tickles unpleasantly is very off putting, so again the worry is that one contaminate the test.    Anyway,  I am negative!  

More English colonialism.

When I wrote to my MP back in 2016 with my concerns about the Brexit arrangements he replied, " As Broxbourne's Member of Parliament, I shall be making every effort to ensure that the Government oversees teh UK's orderly exit from the EU and its institutions"  Despite that the English Government was determined to transition come what may, so I wrote to my MP again, in the light of the Coronavirus and asked that the transition be extended, this is what he said. " I think there will be some constructive discussions around the EU transition timeframe". Clearly this could mean a whole range of things, but it seems to have meant that English colonialism will ignore the wishes of the Scottish and Welsh Governments and the interests of the British public regardless as the Government has yet again determined to exit the transition phase at the end of December despite the failing talks on the arrangement.  

Some of us weep in despair. 

Horrible news from Hoddesdon.

Luckily  missed the news the other day, even at a distance the news is truly horrid as local fascists tried to break up a local Black Lives Matter. I am amazed the area had a Black Lives Matter event,  not sure how people knew anything about it,  not amazed that the fascists came out.  Horrid reminder of how ghastly things can be,  just when everything is ghastly anyhow. Friends in Portugal and on Facebook, brought me up to speed.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-beds-bucks-herts-52979267

Taken to the bottle and taken to the river!

I do not know why but I have taken to drinking wine.  I have also surprised mself byfeeling the need to go to Church, and whilst people continue to die, amazingly people are taking to the streets in Anti Racist Marches.  They have even pulled down a statue of the slave trader, Edward Colston,  in Bristol, which is wonderful,and dragged him and dumped him in the river.   But there is a worry that many black lives will be lost after the demonstrations, but how wonderful that people want to resist and refuse to cope with racism any more.


Thuggery was Boris' comment, criminal damage says Priti Patel  on hearing the news- sounds like a good description of racism and slavery to me.  The British Government especially in recent years have been nothing but viscious to incoming people,  even now people who have lived here for decades have no recourse to public funds despite the crisis and their contributions in taxes, refugees are illegally locked up.  This Goverment is institutionally racist in its policies and they have fostered an anti immigrant approach within the country -just look at the damage done to the Windrush generation to see examples of the damage done by some of their recent policies and Brexit was partly fostered by anti immigrant rhetoric   Of course many of the black population here at British born and with British parents, grandparents all the way back to Roman times and back to the start of time, they have the right to be treated and valued as equals. My son was the recipient of racist treatment by teachers from the minute dot, who discriminated against him and despite complaints to the Government the behaviour of the staff was upheld.    So Boris Johnson do not speak of Thuggery when people rightly and emotionally pull down this statute.  Celebrate their actions.  Celebrate.