Nuggets

 In Switzerland apparently you can go to the doctors and get a covid test result in 10 minutes. (travelling from Switzerland coming to the UK on Radio 4)   They are that efficient and apparently according to a book I am reading to get rid of epidemics you need a very tight test and trace situation, which you can do if you can get test results that easily.  In the UK you still can only test and trace about 50% of people who have tested positive, yet now if you go to Switzerland you have to   quarantine for two weeks.    This book also says that planning in advance is the only way to deal with pandemics - they said only 19 countries had decent plans prior to this current pandemic rather astonishingly the UK was one of them!

Free range chickens apparently are less eco friendly that Red Tractor chickens in a big barn.  

I am pleased to say the Victim's Ombudsman has thanked me for sending in about my experiences of being a victim of crime and about how painful moving through the criminal justice system is. She cannot get my money back,  I know that, but at least she can acknowledge how painful it is to be a victim and the damage it causes,   being groomed is very difficult, to know others have been affected by the choices I made because I was groomed has also been painful.  Because I owed it to my Dad, and my son, who suffered in a way along with me when I defrauded,  I wanted to try and at least be able to take the person who damaged me so much to court and have my say and try and get the money back if possible.  I have been told I am not his only victim, so of course,  I also hoped that taking the matter to court would help other women not be in the same position if only for a short while, whilst he was in the system. I also thought I might even have a better insight into his motivation.  The money he took from me, was a lot for me, but given he took 6 months to achieve it a small return,  so why go to all that effort.  What motivates him and people like him who prefer to use their brains in an illegal way rather than in a legal way.  We can all be bad and stupid but to spend 6 months grooming someone, did that give him a kick?  Or does he feel so inadequate compared with the rest of his family that this is the only way he can raise his sense of self esteem.  Anyway unless another woman reports hims and he is finally taken to court I probably will never know, but if my evidence helps the Victim's Ombudsman address some of the issues with proving fraud and the lack of help for victims, that will be at least something.  

I ranted and raved when he hurt me that badly,    sometimes we need to rant and sometimes we can only be silent. Sometimes when one feels angry one rants, sometimes when something seems just too overwhelming too difficult to unpick and discuss, one stays silent.  And only time will tell whether that really is the end of the conversation or whether one day one can talk again and listen objectively and with compassion and sometimes actually move forward again.