Not fully functioning.

Neither me nor the internet have been fully functioning the last few days.  Either of us could go off again any second, but despite having felt like I was 159 the last few days, I am feeling happy to be 59.  It is Saturday  here, not Friday as stated on the blog.  I know compared with my fathers who will be 85 and 88 this year 59 is nothing, but it still feels amazing to have been on the earth this long, to have experienced so much history, to have experienced and thankfully forgotten many stupid and painful things done over the years but sadly not to be able to remember as clearly as I would like the many brilliant and astonishing things I have done.

Three days ago, suddenly throwing up in the middle of the night I was not so happy. The spectre of a doctor, next day, a very square woman, with a huge dollop of egg on her front chest, inspecting for what was probably last week's bout of sickness and not what has laid me out this week, was the soul entertainment the first day.  I slept, got two tantalizing minutes of a radio programme on teaching maths, then read bits of Conrad complaining about his health, till on Thursday he suddenly died. So he was right to complain.  But as compensation, the whole Ashu family is here at present, so I have been emerging from my room more and more to have more and more bits of food and it is very peaceful just sitting with everyone, they really enjoy laughing together.  On Friday we had some fresh trout from their fish farm, just what someone who is still feeling queasy needs, rather than their usual very fatty soups, which I usually loved, but could not stomach at present.  So I have told them I am celebrating my birthday today and they have all wished me a good day, so that is nice.

It seems strange to me, when I first got here, the matriach of the family seemed a lot older than me, but the truth is we are virtually the same generation, however, since her trip to America, she is dressing very trendily and I realise I have more wrinkles than she does.   But she has this large amazing family, whereas I have a small amazing family.  I told them on Thursday that we were the same generation and she immediately piped up, "Are you retired?", there was something about the way it came that made me pleased to be able to say in the UK we have to work till we are 66, but of course I am not really thrilled about it, especially when I feel as tired as I have this week, but it turns out several of my colleagues have been off ill too and they are all younger than me, so that is a relief, that it is not just me.   It is perhaps connected to the weather, it has been down to -30 at night and apparently my school has been closed this week, and I have felt cold at night. But I think it is probably still better than in all the rain that has been falling in the UK.

If I can get the internet to work long enough I will load pictures from my short birthday walk.

me resisting making angels in the snow but look how deep my footsteps are.